I. AMNON DESIRES TAMAR, 1-10
A. Evil Suggestion, 1-5
1. Record of mental abuse, 1-2
2. Record of psychological abuse, 3-5
B. Ungodly Subtlety, 6-10
II. AMNON DEFILES TAMAR, 11-19
A. Record of Sexual Abuse, 11-14
B. Reaction of a Sinful Attitude, 15-19
1. Record of verbal abuse, 15-17
2. Record of emotional abuse, 18-19
III. ABSALOM COUNSELS TAMAR, 20
I come to class well prepared, but most Sundays the Holy Spirit prompts me to say things not in my notes, or not part of my preparation. Some of those things are probably better than the thoughts on my outline sheets.
Last Sunday we talked about painting over your flaws from 2 Sam 13:1-20, both parental faults and imperfections left from how your parents raised you. We pointed out that
Thesis: Parenting is so pivotal and primary in a child's development that what you end up being has a lot to do with who you come from.
That is why, it takes contemplating the Lord Jesus Christ in order to become like him. Turn toward evil, and you become more like the Devil because sin erases God's original image and starts to implant another one. (It is this idea of spiritual transference that is behind the Lord's command to make disciples. Our discipleship ministry is based on the premise that Christ's character can be passed-on from one mature person to another by utilizing the Bible and the Holy Spirit's help.)
Num 14:18 The LORD is ... visiting the iniquity of the fathers upon the children unto the third and fourth generation.
If children see dysfunction they will perpetrate dysfunctionality. They become a next-generation abuser. So whatever you do as a parent gives direction to your child's destiny!
Point 1. It is good for us to recognize who we are based on who we came from, and then biblically process our genetic predispositions based on whose we are and who we have become in Jesus Christ.
Get a grip on your genes. Otherwise past parental influence will become your puppeteer, invisibly pulling your strings. You've got to face your flaws in order to fix them. Don't paint over without patching, or else the dysfunction will still be there. Such was the case with King David and his kids. Let me pause here parenthetically to point out that
Point 2. We’ve got to stop our fake approach to life and start having a faith approach to life.
We've got to seek God's face for more grace to correct our genes. But that's okay, because
Point 3. God specializes in taking bad genes out of your background, and setting you up by grace to get godly results out of your foreground.
1 Sam 13 provides us with the footprints of mental (vv 1-2) and psychological abuse (vv 3-5), on the pathway to sexual abuse (11-14), verbal abuse (15-17) and emotional abuse (18-19).
We unpacked all that on Sunday, but let me just give you the answer. Any idea that is not godly should be ignored. (I just gave you the answer!)
2 Tim 2:3 Thou therefore endure hardness, as a good soldier of Jesus Christ.
If you do not ignore it by enduring it, Satan will bring to your attention some subtle way of getting it. Hello somebody! You have the disease of dwelling on it! That's easy to fall into, because
Point 4. Satan has an agenda to make what you have going for you be used against you.
Amnon engages in sexual dealing to try and get emotional healing. So now he ends up treating Tamar according to what he really thought of her (you'll have to go back and read the passage to get that). So let me tell you how to
PAINT OVER YOUR FLAWS
1. Something bad may have happened, but you can fix whatever you are willing to face with faith
Okay, I'm about to give you the answer again. You can fix anything you are willing to let God tell you how to think about. (I just gave you the answer!) How'd you miss that, all these years? You can fix anything you will process through the Bible and apply its principles as your balm for healing.
In verse 20 Absalom counsels his sister and says "regard not this thing." Or as the James Gang inserts into your margin, "Set not your heart on this thing.” So
2. Do not allow what happens to you to get in you, because then it cannot make a victim out of you
This is biblical counsel on how to handle your memory. Be determined that your inner man is going to take a stand and perform up to Bible principles.
Psa 143:3-6 For the enemy hath persecuted my soul; he hath smitten my life down to the ground; he hath made me to dwell in darkness, as those that have been long dead. Therefore is my spirit overwhelmed within me; my heart within me is desolate. I remember the days of old; I meditate on all thy works; I muse on the work of thy hands. I stretch forth my hands unto thee: my soul thirsteth after thee, as a thirsty land. Selah.
Do the three things David says do. This is your therapy:
(1) Remember
(2) Meditate
(3) Muse (self-counsel)
Handle your mind by what you put in memory, what you meditate on, and how you talk to yourself. That will be $125, your session time is up.
If you stuff your emotions it will turn to bitterness and depression.
If you vent your emotions you are a bigger fool than the one who hurt you.
Muse your emotions, and HOLD UP YOUR END OF PRAISE!
Job 11:13,15-16 If thou prepare thine heart, and stretch out thine hands toward him; …then shalt thou lift up thy face without spot; yea, thou shalt be stedfast, and shalt not fear: Because thou shalt forget thy misery, and remember it as waters that pass away:
God won't always give you the answer, but he always gives you grace. That will be another $25.
3. If you remember your name you can always rise above your shame
Neither Amnon nor Tamar is living up to their name. Amnon means faithful and Tamar means palm tree. A palm tree is someone whose longevity is based on their flexibility, and who always walks in victory, because they've turned their root into a “tap root” that has discovered invisible resources deep inside.
If you remember who you are in Jesus, you can rise above anything that happened to you in Adam. Handle-up on your parenting. Parent up!
